Missing my blog

Okay so I'm seriously missing my blog. It's not that I don't have time (although that can be a challenge with 3 kids) - it's that I never seem to find the inspiration or right topic to get me started. I am hoping it's just a case of writer's block and I'll be through it soon. My problem is that I'm a perfectionist and every time I sit down to write, I want to write really well... you know, from my heart... the kind of writing that is meaningful and inspiring. That is my goal (how lofty and egotistical of me!!). However, it is hard to think those kinds of thoughts and string together words so that the story or message I'm relaying is meaningful when there are kids screaming at each other, pounding on the door, making the baby cry (accidentally of course), whining about something, breaking things, asking for my help, or telling on each other, etc. You get the picture, right? Talk about some serious writer's block!! I will start a post and then set it aside for that moment when inspiration will hit me to finish it... and alas, it never happens. So... I have about 20 half-finished (half you-know-what) blogs. My goal is to finish them and get back on track. I will focus on this over the next week or so.

I hope you can hold me accountable for this. (IF I even have any blog readers anymore... stay on my case).
Thanks!

What is my calling?

Okay - where to start. First of all, in the wake of this 2nd earthquake in 2010... I feel so helpless! Helpless that at times of pain and suffering in our world, there is nothing I can do. I feel like God is tugging on my heart and preparing me for SOMEthing, but I am confused as to what that "something" might be. I clearly cannot go to Haiti or Chile right now to help those inflicted by these terrible earthquakes. I have a 4 month old baby that I am nursing 100% of the time so I cannot leave her for even 1 day. That prevents me from physically going there... so what else can I do.
Sure, I can give money (and we have).
I can pray (and we do).
I can trust that with God's love ALL things are possible (and I truly do believe in Him).
But I just feel in my heart that God has a bigger plan for me and I just for the life of me cannot figure out what it is. I have prayed for him to reveal it to me... but I know that God's time is not always the same as "my" time.

I just feel SO helpless (from my very comfortable home where food and water are readily available) as I watch (on one of my multiple TVs) the absolute loss and suffering they are experiencing. It seems so cruel that we have so much and something so tragic can happen to people that have so little. I don't understand it.
I can only pray.
Pray for for healing for the traumatized, sheltor for the homeless and love for the orphaned.
Pray for water (to drink and bathe), food and medicine (for those who need it).
Pray for diapers and milk for the babies (can you imagine not being able to change your baby's diaper or feed her when she's hungry?) I think of this every time I hold Whitley.
Pray for those sweet, sweet children who lost one or both of their parents. They must be so scared! So sad! So lost. How their little lives have been forever changed.
I wish I could just... do... SOMEthing. Please God - reveal to me your plan.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28

Paisley's 1st Slumber Party

My baby girl is growing up. She had her first slumber party with a friend (Channing) tonight. They ate popcorn, drank apple juice (watered down of course) and watched some TV before hitting bed. When it was time to go to sleep, Channing became concerned and wanted to sleep in her own bed (this was her 1st time sleeping away from home as well) SO Paisley (Miss Independant) decided to sleep over there instead.

Now that's a happening slumber party - start out at one house and end up at another. Let's hope they don't do that when they're teens!

Snowman Poop

Last week when the kids had the day off from school due to the wintry mix the south received, we decided to make the best of it. So... we made "Snowman Poop" for all of our neighborhood friends.
You might be asking what "Snowman Poop" is... it is marshmallows, white tictacs (or other white candies), and white chocolate chips. The fun part was that Daddy arrived home just in time to deliver it with us so we did this as a family. And Daddy was trying to teach Paisley and Colby to "ring and run"... that was pretty funny.


They didn't quite get back to the car before most people saw them... but it was fun trying to teach them to be quick and sneaky (all in the name of good, harmless winter fun).
Here's to Snowman Poop - YUM!

Welcome 2010!

Well, I should (hopefully) be back for good this time. I have missed blogging terribly but I had so much going on with the kids and the holidays that it had to fall by the wayside. However, I'm excited to be back.

I'll start off with "Happy New Year!" and list my wishes for 2010. I saw that one of my blogger friends called them wishes instead of resolutions and I like that so I'm stealing it (thanks Stephanie!).

My wishes for 2010 are:
To stay active in my bible study/ devotion every day
To be a more present mom
To spend one-on-one time with Paisley and Colby every week
To do 1 educational field trip with them every other week (museums, aquarium, etc)
To blog regularly
To get rid of the residual baby weight by exercising at least 3 times a week and eating healthier
To stay off of the computer and keep the TV off between 5 pm and 7 pm every night - that will be just family time
To help Colby conquer potty-training
To say no to other people and yes to my kids more
To read at least 3 books this year (me personally)
To have family game night/ movie night once a week
To do at least one adventure race this year
To go through my closet and get rid of A LOT of my clothes (starting with my maternity clothes)
To learn to sell on eBay and rid myself of some things (simplify life)
To be a better mom and wife (always)
To have our family dinners mapped out for 2 weeks at a time instead of just 1
To limit computer/ TV time in the house
To read to the kids for (at least) 30 minutes a day
To enjoy every second (because it all goes by too fast)

Feel free to share some of your wishes for 2010 too.
Thanks.
Lisa

Hands

"We clasp the hands of those that go before us... as well as the hands of those who come after. In this moment, we enter the circle of those joined together in the dance of life."

(Curtis's hand is on bottom, then clockwise Whitley, Colby, Paisley and me.)

Welcome Whitley McKaye

Finally she has arrived!! We were blessed to welcome Whitley McKaye into our lives on October 27th. She is beautiful and perfect in every way and we are head over heels in love with her. We praise you God for your love and blessings in our life.

Colby and his bike

Well, I cannot imagine a more proud dad than Curtis. He is completely biased, of course, and always thinks his kids are super stars, but Colby's latest accomplishment really put him over the moon. As a true sportsman who loves biking and has talked incessantly (since the day they were born) about taking the kids mountain biking with him as soon as they are old enough, I don't think even he could have predicted what Colby would be able to do at 2 years and 5 months old. Paisley has been riding her bicycle without training wheels since August (she is 4 years old, mind you)... and Colby watches her and watches her and you can tell that he wanted to do it too. However, he would patiently ride her old bike with training wheels hoping for the day he was tall enough to ride her "big girl" bike. He'd ask everyday, but Curtis would simply respond "One day, Colby, one day you can do it too!"

Well, Curtis saw this look in Colby's eyes the other day as he was watching Paisley ride. He seemed to be dissecting inside his head how she was doing it all so Curtis decided to remove his training wheels and see what happened. Sure enough, Colby got on the bike, took off, found his balance pretty quickly and never looked back. Oh, sure... his stopping isn't very pretty, but he can ride in circles or straight and even change directions with no problem. He doesn't even want Curtis to run beside him (which gives me slight heart failure). Even I have to admit, it is impressive to see such a little guy riding his bike all by himself.

I'm sure it won't be long before he's jumping curbs and doing other tricks that I'd prefer he never learned.
Check out the video and see for yourself.

Praying for Sterling!

Please keep my good friend, Roger, along with his wife and little boy, Sterling, in your prayers. Sterling is 5 years old and I can still remember holding him for the first time when he was just a newborn. He was the sweetest little baby and holding him brought home for me the miracle of my own little blessing growing inside my belly (I was pregnant at the time and anxiously awaiting Paisley's arrival a few months later). Sweet little Sterling - whom God graciously placed in Roger and Becca's care to raise and to love - has been diagnosed with a brain tumor. They will know more about his condition as they continue to do tests on him over the next few weeks. Right now, it is a waiting game - and I know they need all of our prayers. As a parent with a child of nearly the same age, I cannot imagine the fear and helplessness they must be feeling right now. I pray that they will get strength from all those who love and are fervently praying for them. Their faith is amazing!

God, I ask that you comfort Roger and Becca and lift them up during this time. Carry them when they cannot move... love them when they feel anxious and unsure... reassure them when they are afraid. Place your loving, healing arms around Sterling. Give his young body the strength and ability to fight and to overcome. In your precious son's name we pray. Amen!

2 weeks and counting...

I know I haven't been the best blogger as of late. I have to blame it on nesting. I have been busy cleaning and sorting and planning for when my sweet baby girl arrives. We are at 2 weeks and counting (but remember, I'm always late so it could be 3-4 that we're looking at). I would be lying if I said there were not moments when I thought "what have I done?" - simply because life is going to be somewhat chaotic for a while and I know that. However, I am really excited to hold her and see her sweet little face and get to know her personality. Paisley cannot wait for her to arrive as well and asks me every day when she will get here. I wish I had an answer for her - we'll all just have to wait and see.

Come on out, baby girl - we cannot wait to meet you!

I will blog again (soon!)

So, I apologize for my absence in blogging. It's been a tough couple of weeks. Between my husband being gone for 8 days to Italy and being sick for the last week and a half with Bronchitus... all while 8+ months pregnant... blogging has been a low priority lately. I'll try to get a new post up sometime soon.

Maternity Photos

My friend, Jette, (who happens to be an AMAZING photographer) took some maternity photos of me. They turned out great, but I have a feeling Jette could make anyone look good. We had so much fun at the shoot - even the kids cooperated. 

Check them out if you have a sec.

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2030219&id=1556383201&l=584ca4e657

Advice anyone?

So, after I mentioned it in my last blog post... it actually happened. I must have had intuition that this conversation was coming my way. I was walking Paisley to school this morning when out of the blue she asked me how the baby was going to get out of my belly. I was semi-panicked (because I hadn't thought through what I would tell her)... but I responded that I would go to the hospital and the doctor would help me get her out. 

She seemed satisfied at first... but after thinking about it for a moment, she said "Just like a chick hatches from an egg?" 

"Very similar," was my reply. 

Again, she was silent for a few minutes. Then she repeated, "So, how does the baby come out again?"

At this moment I saw her teacher and quickly changed the subject. And that is how we left it.

Now I've managed to put her off for a little while, but knowing Paisley this question will eventually re-surface. This is where all of you come into the picture. I'm asking for your advice. Even if you are a "Blurker" (a blog lurker who doesn't like to comment), I would appreciate if you'd click on the comment link just below this post (it's in blue) and offer your advice for how I should handle telling my 4 year old how babies are born. Any advice you can offer will be great!

Thanks in advance!

The Bump

I have to wonder what Colby thinks as he sees my belly growing bigger and bigger. Paisley is old enough to understand what's going on (to the extent that a 4 year old can understand that a human being is living inside my belly and one day will come out to live among us)... but Colby doesn't really acknowledge "the bump" at all. People ask him if he knows where mama's baby is and he points to himself. I ask him if he knows he is about to have a baby sister and he looks at Paisley - probably because she is his big sister and he cannot yet differentiate. 

Out of shear laziness and exhaustion last night - not to mention my husband's absence due to a meeting - I threw both kids and myself into our whirlpool tub for a group bath before bedtime. We were all needing to wash off after being at the pool and this seemed easier than leaning over the tub to wash them one-by-one... seeing as my belly is beginning to make even simple tasks such as these much more complicated. So, as we're sitting there splashing in the tub, singing "Splish, splash I was taking a bath" and making bubble beards on each other's faces... Colby curiously points at my belly with a smile. I look into his big, blue eyes and try to imagine what he could be thinking. 
Does he think I drank too much pool water?
Does he think I am bloated from eating too much dinner (and dessert) the night before?
Does he think I've just put on a few pounds? (okay more than a few)
Or does he think I've always been this way and he's just now noticing it for the first time?

I think the reality is there is nothing but curiosity behind those adorable eyes. I think he just likes how massive my belly appears as it floats between me and him in the tub... or how the bubbles settle on top like whipped cream on a pie. Maybe it makes a nice pillow when we cuddle. I know it makes a good ledge for him to sit on when I'm holding him. (We'll both miss that!)

I truly believe he has NO idea there is a baby inside there.
And what about when I'm cuddling with him at night and the baby gives him a swift kick in the stomach... I mean, this baby can throw a punch or two when she wants to and I know firsthand how strong it feels on the outside. She has even been known to knock the remote control off my belly with her kicks. So what does Colby think when he's quietly snuggling with me and all of the sudden gets a sharp jolt to his gut? Does he think it was me? And doesn't he wonder why all of the sudden my belly is packing punches his way?

Paisley, on the other hand, likes to rub "the bump". She is fascinated with the fact that the baby can hear her voice - she will talk to her many times a day and tell her all of the things she will do for her once she is born. It's really precious. Still, I wonder if she ever thinks about how the baby will get out of my belly. You think she would wonder about that - but luckily she hasn't asked me yet. (That will be some conversation, I'm sure!) Recently, she was concerned about the 3D ultrasound pictures I got because the baby looked so dark in there. She wanted me to turn the light on so the baby could see. Too cute. As a (very young) woman who will hopefully one day experience carrying and delivering a baby herself, I think it's wonderful that she is taking such an interest in all of the details. I want her to embrace her womanhood - especially the miracle of what her body can create and sustain - and to be proud that she has been gifted the right to fully experience it. 

I think "the bump" is a beautiful thing. I can't say I love the feeling of my breasts touching my belly per se... but I think there is nothing more beautiful than the miracle of life. A glowing, pregnant woman is proof positive that no matter what happens in the world, life truly does go on. I am sad when I realize I only have 7 (or so) weeks left pregnant. This is my last pregnancy and I can honestly say I will miss "the bump". In the same way, I am honored that God gave me the chance to experience it firsthand. Women may have to deal with periods, cramps, the pains of labor and menopause... but, in my opinion, we definitely get the best end of the deal. We experience the joy of feeling a miracle grow and move within us... we get to love someone before anyone else on this earth can touch, feel or see them... and we are blessed with a bond that is unbreakable. 

Now, that is a "bumpy" ride worth taking!

Colby's first day of 2 year old preschool

Colby went off to his first day of 2 year old preschool today. It's more a combo of Mothers-Day-Out and preschool but he will be learning, reading, singing and playing so it's all good. I love his teacher - Paisley had her two years ago as well. She is an amazing, loving woman that God has blessed with the gift of teaching and the ability to love toddlers!! Anyway, as sad as I am to see him growing up before my very eyes, I am happy to see how much he loved going to school today. And no matter what - I can rest easy knowing he is in such good hands!

Here's a poem for Colby's first day:
"Whose Child Is This?" by Anonymous

"Whose child is this?" I asked one day
Seeing a little one out at play
"Mine", said the parent with a tender smile
"Mine to keep a little while
To bathe his hands and comb his hair
To tell him what he is to wear
To prepare him that he may always be good
And each day do the things he should"

"Whose child is this?" I asked again
As the door opened and someone came in
"Mine", said the teacher with the same tender smile
"Mine, to keep just for a little while
To teach him how to be gentle and kind
To train and direct his dear little mind
To help him live by every rule
And get the best he can from school"

"Whose child is this?" I ask once more
Just as the little one entered the door
"Ours" said the parent and the teacher as they smiled
And each took the hand of the little child
"Ours to love and train together
Ours this blessed task forever."